It has been a very somber weekend for me. I'm thinking about my mom constantly and it still hurts as if it happened yesterday. She was really a great mother and an awesome grandmother and I'm sad that you won't be able to experience her first hand. I'm sure though, that your cousins, Julian, Christian and Austin will give you first hand accounts about how much she loved, how great she cooked, how she was always there for them, and her kindness simply cannot be put into words. The kindness of grandmothers. My grandmother, I used to call her Nanny, was what my mother was and is to my nephews. Probably you don't understand that but you'll feel it in our household, I'll make sure of that.
I have that feeling in my chest that I want my mom really bad, to be here, with me right now and I know that's not possible. That's when the tears come to my eyes and I get really sad. I know that you both have the same feelings about your birth mother and I promise to help you through those feelings, but I know those feelings only become bearable, they never go away. I promise to do whatever I can to help you through those feelings of wanting your birth mother and helping those feelings become bearable to you, because if they're bad for an adult I don't want to imagine how bad they might be for you.
Ok -- Next Mother's Day, I'll be a mother. I'll be your mother. I want to start a tradition and I want you to know about it now: Mother's Day in our house will always be a cause for celebration -- first, I will celebrate my mother and then my children, because without you I wouldn't even be a mom. I'll bring into your lives the very best my mother brought into mine. Below are pics of Grandma Rosie with her grandkids -- you can easily see how happy she was in their presence -- and today she's looking down on you both and guiding us together, I have no doubt.
To all the mother's out there -- Happy Mother's day! And Happy Mother's day to the woman who gave me my nephews! Happy Mother's Day Susan!
Muito Amor,
Mommy
